Monday, October 10, 2005

Going.. GOing... GONE!

Just a little shamless pluggin!

visit my art-blog and leave me your comments!

heh heh heh.

as many comments as you want! *hint hint*

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(click on the banner, you know you want to. you know you can't resist it! muahahaha...)



Random post


i never knew packing a damned luggage could be so irritating. ARGH. i don't remember if i left anything out and i can't be bloody bothered even though there's this niggling thought at the back of my head telling me i've left out something real important like pads or bras.

yes, i gots me new spiffy WATER-PROOF boots!!! yay!! i gots boots!

the jackets are really taking up a damned amount of space therefore i'm only bringing me 4 pants to last the entire month. BAHAHAA. i've probably got to wear them like 1 week before i wash them. eww. HHAAHaHahaa.

--- let me think of something to write about so i can delay going back to packing.



--ah yes, lemme tell you how i got into rock/metal music. it's a semi-funny story. or maybe just pretty pathetic.

late in sec one i bought this shirt from the pasar malam. it said

"Ozzfest 2001
black sabbath
papa roach
plus other acts to be announced"

i still have it, this shirt --> Image Hosted by

then i wore it out one day on a (concert) band outing. (i play the french horn!!!! it's a sibei beautiful instrument. THE BEST IN THE BAND!) and this senior whom i thought was incredibly INCREDIBLY cool asked me. "WAh, you listen to black sabbath? Make sure you don't listen too loud, later spoil your ears, no more perfect pitch."

me was thinking "huh? wad talking you? black sabbath...? sabbath is the day where people don't work?" but said, "okie, sure."


so to impress him (sorta) and because i have an insatiable curiosity + a phobia of looking stupid in front of others, i looked it up, the bands on the t-shirt. and there goes the long long deep deep fall into rock music. XD i haven't looked back since.

i suppose i should be glad i bought the t-shirt. i didn't have a crush on the senior lah, he was just that kinda guy everybody kinda looked up to as a big brother asshole kinda person.

muahaha. before that i was mostly listening to new age/classical music. my dad was pretty horrified when i made the switch because i used to be a hoity toity idiot who looked down on people listening to pop. er, i suppose i still am.

pop = shiet. pop = commercialised. pop = death of music. therefore, pop = shit.

which is also why i really HATE talent shows. like the chanel u project superstar thingamajig. talk about selling out your soul. :/ subjecting yourself to humiliation and changing yourself to suit the industry instead of making people like your music, then whoring yourself in front of the camera doing stupid things like eating orhlua in ecstacy, moaning like you've just had your first orgasm. doesn't help that the orhlua looks pretty yucky and cheapo. not like the kopitiam ones at all.

my effing gawd. it's just pure crap! it makes me fucking mad.

i hate it when new young good bands get famous. it all goes downhill after that. like linkin park. one great album = many rabid fans = many many much much moneh = getting complacent = crap music.

X japan is my favourite band. do listen to their music if you have the chance to. especially the drumming. and the vocals. and the guitars. AIYAH EVERYTHING LAH.

the beatles are my 2nd favourite band. no need to elaborate la hor? you guys should know why.

i don't like the rolling stones. or scissor sisters.

i love glam rock.

i love metal too.

i kinda like goth/death metal, sometimes.

i think the local music scene is pretty great! fav band from the region is Naked Breed, band from Malaysia i think. caught them at Baybeats with Clar!

b-quartet is my favourite local band.

alot of local bands have great music but sucky vocalists. :X

i hate techno music. or anything with repeated distorted stuff and alot of synth stuff. it makes my head ache.

queen rocks.

weirdly enough, alot of my favourite bands have members that died from suicide. (think nirvana and x japan.) but then again, the drugs and alcohol will probably kill them if the aids doesn't.

and i think courtney love is really horrible to look at now. i can't imagine kurt married to her. my gawd. WHY?!?!?!?!?!? but if i were married to kurt (XD) i'd probably kill myself too when he did. no wonder courtney looks like crap now.

and most of my favourite bands are from the 70-80s. the truly great ones. they don't care about the money - or at least it doesn't show in their music. or maybe i'm just biased.

music now is really crappy. i hate hip hop stuff thingy. i hate black eyed peas. i don't know the bands that are all the rage now. bahahahaa. i should have been born 20 years ago, dammit!

i have a jessica simpson cd. it's now relegated to the deepest, darkest corner of my drawer, never to see the light of day again. i can't bring myself to sell it to any second hand shop because i'd probably die from the shame.

i've already dumped the britney one. (go me!)

(just in case you are wondering why the hell i have them... i briefly caved in to peer pressure in sec 2. got myself back after a few months of listening to pop, pretending that i actually liked it so that i had something to talk about with my friends. they usually don't listen to new age/classical stuff, and teenagers being teenagers we only talk about music, the latest happenings, boys, etc. therefore i was the only odd one out. AND I WAS SICK OF IT, therefore i caved in. Shame on me!)

wah liew. i read through the entry and i sound like a friggin snob. I'M NOT! (really!) i listen to other stuff too. good stuff. even semi-pop. like stephanie sun and stuff. (i do NOT like sun ho. :/ the whole church thing just turns me off, no offence to christians.) the line between good pop-pish music and bad ones is VERY VERY VERY thick. it's like a chasm.

good pop(py) stuff does exist actually. I take back what i said earlier, some of it.

you know sometimes world music is nice too. like african choral music.. celtic music.. etc.. because when you don't understand the lyrics, you feel the music more, you can put your own intepretation to it. sometimes lyrics just ruin everything. but then again, lyrics can be everything. this is too late to get into an internal debate.

moving on!

hmm. i seem to talk alot about music. hahahaa. probably because it is my only interest besides drawing and reading.

i have no life. :/ but it's kinda nice too. i like chilling out by myself. XD

shiet. 2.11 am and i'm still not finished packing. HAHAHA. okie. buhbye.

Saturday, October 08, 2005

I Want It All

Words and music by Queen

Adventure seeker on an empty street
Just an alley creeper light on his feet
A young fighter screaming with no time for doubt
With the pain and anger can't see a way out
It ain't much I'm asking I heard him say
Gotta find me a future move out of my way
I want it all I want it all I want it all and I want it now
I want it all I want it all I want it all and I want it now

Listen all you people come gather round
I gotta get me a game plan gotta shake you to the ground
Just give me what I know is mine
People do you hear me just give me the sign
It ain't much I'm asking if you want the truth
Here's to the future for the dreams of youth
I want it all (give it all) I want it all I want it all and I want
it now
I want it all (yes I want it all) I want it all (hey)
I want it all and I want it now

I'm a man with a one track mind
So much to do in one life time (people do you hear me)
Not a man for compromise and where's and why's and living
So I'm living it all (yes I'm living it all)
And I'm giving it all (and I'm giving it all)

Yeah yeah
Yeah yeah yeah yeah
I want it all all all all

It ain't much I'm asking if you want the truth
Here's to the future
Hear the cry of youth (hear the cry hear the cry of youth)
I want it all I want it all I want it all and I want it now
I want it all (yeah yeah yeah) I want it all I want it all and I
want it now

I want it
I want it I want it

Frankie's Request.

Halloween is my favourite festival. ABSOLUTE FAVOURITE! (what else would you expect from a rabid Tim Burton fan who has watched Nightmare at least 20+ times?) Too bad we don't celebrate it much in Singapore. :(

You know, when I was younger, I've always thought Halloween was Christmas for monsters and ghoulies. I still think that.

This is RATHER inspired by the traumatising fugly creative haircut the stylist gave me.

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this will probably be the last post for a month. i know you won't miss my writings. HAHAHA. because most of it is crap anyways. :D

thanks for the well-wishes!

now i shall try to pack the luggage.

I know we don't celebrate it in Singapore, but still. HAPPY HALLOWEEN in advance!

P.S. : Just to mention, it'd be winter in the part i'm going, there will probably be snow! Yay! :P


i've updated phreaque-art!


Friday, October 07, 2005


i didn't mean to post another time but i just HAVE TO.

i blew close to 200 bucks today on stuff. mostly bras. -_-" offer at C.S. buy 100 bucks get 50 bucks voucher.

then i had a haircut and it is omfg ridiculously ugly. i sat there in the chair watching the hairstylist cut my hair with morbid fascination, knowing all the while it's going to be ugly and did nothing at all to stop it. just sat there and watched the "show".


and sat there slightly stunned and disbelieving that my hair could actually look so bad.

....i can't believe i did nothing to stop him.

i can't believe it.


i still can't believe it.



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i think more than anything, music has been the biggest influencing factor in my life. even more than my pencil and daler rowley paper - even in art i get good days and bad days.
it's the only thing in the world i trust 100% besides myself.

guys who speak of "4eva luv" and friends who say "friends 4eva!" eventually turn their backs on you, but who could blame them? people change.

friends come and friends go, people drift in and out of my life, music is the only constant. whichever phase i am going through, whatever troubles i'm facing, it'll always be there, an infinite source of comfort.

my cd collection totals up to more than 500. 2 drawers + 1 stack on the table. methinks the mp3 player is the greatest invention since air-con. cos i was one of those people who carry a stack of cds wherever they go and change it on the mrt/bus. :X

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my fav stack. all the cds i listen to here. rock, jrock, blah blah. whatever catches my fancy.

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new age/instrumental/classical, etc.

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jrock/soundtracks, etc.

Random post

You're Pale Fire!

by Vladimir Nabokov

You're really into poetry and the interpretation thereof. Along the
road of life, you have had several identity crises which make it very unclear who you
are, let alone how to interpret poetry. You probably came from a foreign country, but
then again you seem foreign to everyone in ways unrelated to immigration. Most people
think you're quite funny, but maybe you're just sick. Talking to you ends up being much
like playing a round of the popular board game Clue.

Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.


linked to it from sieteocho's blog. internet quizzes are so fun

one of my favourite songs from billy idol's latest album :

Yellin' At The Xmas Tree

(Billy Idol/Brian Tichy)

When I was a small boy
Here in London town
Seasons snow was falling on the ground
All the friends and family
Here on Christmas Eve
Gather round to dress
The Christmas tree
But daddy's down at the pub
Full of Christmas cheer
Probably won't come home
Until next year

Oh the Christmas bells are ringing
And the carolers are singing
But Daddy, he don't hear 'em
He's yellin' at the Christmas tree
Santa's balls are jingling
Mommy's hips a-wiggling
But Daddy, he don't hear 'em
He's yellin, he's yellin'
At the Christmas tree

All right now yeah...

Uncle is a sports fan
Granny likes a joke
But no one laughs when
Daddy's stumbles home
But he don't fall asleep
Wah! The night was getting black

You see, oh God,
Dad had too much Jack
Oh Lord!

Every year is the same old thing
Like Rudolph's red nose
Telling this story will never get old


Well alright now yeah...
Well alright now...
Yellin' at the Christmas tree

Santa came down the chimney
But then he ran upstairs
Jumped in bed with Mommy
She didn't care
Across the room went the fruitcakes
Ah, the wreath came off the door
If these are holidays I can take no more
Every year it's the same old thing
Like Rudolph's red nose
Hearing this story will never get old


Santa's balls are jingling
Mommy's hips a-wiggling
But Daddy, he don't hear 'em
He's yellin'
He's yellin' at the Christmas tree

Well alright now yeah...

He's yellin' at the Christmas tree
He's yellin' at the Christmas tree
He's yellin' at the Christmas tree
He's sleeping at the Christmas tree

Thursday, October 06, 2005


This is done by me, around 2002.

why am i posting this ugly piece of shiet up?

because i'm friggin sick of people telling me that i'm lucky to have my artistic "talent" and don't have to follow the normal path to jc and study study study study and take exams like they have to.

this is one of the better pieces too.

what i'm really trying to say here is my talent isn't god-given okie. it comes from practice and working my ass off. it's not like the muse comes i pick up the pencil and just start drawing my hand off. it's not like that.

i had to work fucking hard to get to where i am now you asshole. so think before you fucking speak.

okie. rant over.

now to tell you why i started drawing.

i started drawing doodling during secondary school because i was too bored in class. "blatantly doodling" as one of my teachers said it "in front of her nose". what to do? classes were boring and there was nothing to occupy my attention. got streamed to the triple science, double math class and most of my friends were in the D&T class. bored la.

so i started doodling in class. but not just any doodles. i did torture doodles of one Mdm Lee Ch** N**. I was just flipping through my social studies textbook the other day, practically every page was filled with images of how i'd like to torture her.

yeah. my passion for drawing starts here. so i suppose i should thank all the teachers who bored me in class.

a big thank you to all the boring teachers who inspired my art. Really, i thank you from the bottom of my heart.

not to forget Mr Richard Koh and Ms Josephine Ho who encouraged my interest. A special thanks to you guys! thank you!!

i'm sorry for ever thinking you were a faggot er. nevermind. :X

but actually i only started seriously drawing after i left school. hahaha. still a long way to go before i'm actually good. but oh well. still young, can one la.


4+ and i'm still not sleepy. :/ .........



i had this weirdest feeling, a deja vu of a deja vu. does it make sense?

i was just doodling in photoshop (what else do i do?) and listening to Queen and then i had this feeling that i had this feeling before when i was doing the same thing.

and the freakiest thing is that i clearly remember feeling this way before. extremely strongly. somehow there's this sensation or knowledge that i'm trapped in a cycle where i'm made to do things over and over, like my life isn't mine to control because i cannot help being in the cycle anymore than i can break out of it.

that is just freaky weird.


i'm so hungry! nobody's up yet = no food.

it's just 4 more days before i leave for China! my uncle converted S$500 for me. woohoo! i have no idea why he's giving me money, but it's good, being one of the few girls on my mom's side of the family. heh. XD

i think my eyes are auto-corrective. i used to wear glasses. now i don't. haha! and i didn't even do anything. i was complaining about my blurry eyesightm previously, now it's perfectly fine.

i love my eyes eyeballs!

:/ shiet. i really really need sleep, but i cannot drift into dreamland. is this insomnia?? or just hyperactivity in the brain?

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

new banners

hahahahaha. did this last night. i know. i am easily distracted can! :P

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i'm on a sugar high from the kitkat. arhahaha.


i've updated phreaque-art!



omfg. haha! i'm so pissed. -_-" the journal i stayed the whole night up to do is completely wrong. HAHAHA. the lecturer wants a personalized journal (complete with doodles and all), not essay-type journal. WTF! when she said that i almost stuffed my slippers into her mouth. but aiyah. the lecturer so pretty and nice. couldn't bear to do it. argh. HAHAHAHA. oh my friggin ass. i'm starting to feel the repercussions.

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this is why you shouldn't buy food when you are pissed off. XD but meiji chocos are SO NICE! NICE NICE NICE!! they make me happy!

aiyah. this is one of the entries in the journal. might as well do something with it. kns. keep in mind this is done at 4am in the morning. i know it sucks, you don't have to tell me it sucks. :P alot of facutal errors and whatnot. this is just to make me feel like i haven't wasted my whole night writing it. be fair. 3/4s of the night was spent doodling in photoshop because i was so damned bored of writing. bahahaha. so the journal was done in ard 2 hours. BAhahHAhaaaAAa.

i can't help it! if i wanted to write damned essays i would have gone to JC. not design school. :X


Singapore is one of the most successful examples of globalization. Most of the population as we see now are descendents of immigrants from China, India, Malaysia and various other countries. Globalization is a natural occurrence where people move from one location to another in search of a better life. This is also why Singapore is a melting hotpot of cultural diversity.

Besides that, the share of foreigners in Singapore’s labor force doubled between 1992 and 1998, from 12 to 25 percent. In addition, there are more than 80 000 foreign professionals in Singapore. Based on these facts alone we can safely assert that Singapore is truly diverse and values diversity.

Ethnocentrism occurs when there is the tendency to view one’s own culture as the best and only proper way to live and to compare other cultures to one’s own as the standard. It rarely occurs in Singapore because no one race, religion or culture is considered above the rest or is given special privileges. However, due to our relatively higher standard of living, our citizens may have been living in comfort for so long, they fail to adapt when facing hardships and difficulties encountered in third world countries like the lack of clean water supply or hygienic facilities.

This is a natural reaction and one that is probably well justified because humans are habitual creatures and once taken out of their natural habitat, would most probably fail to adapt and integrate into the new environment. It is however, essential to be sensitive to the cultural differences and keep in mind to be tactful when voicing dissent.

Valuing diversity does not mean that you have to accept all customs and practices of a different culture, because they might not be in accord to your own beliefs and faith. It is also not totally adapting into the culture because that would mean a loss of your own. Rather, valuing diversity means that one should maintain a basic respect of all cultures and humanity, and not thinking that one’s own culture is better than others.


this is one part of the another entry.

Trees are cut down each day for paper and fuel, where much of it is wasted on powering air conditioners and printing reports such as these.


argh, i need sleep.


Tuesday, October 04, 2005

sleepless in singapore

oh my )W$#*(#&^$ hell shiet. i'm so dead. need to finish 1200 word min essay + 1200 word max journal by tml. HAHA. siao.

cya. no time to talk.

wah lao eh! i hate writing argumentative essays! I HATE IT HATE IT HATE IT! :(
why can't they throw me a 2000 word descriptive narrative one instead.



OMFG YEAH! finished the damned essay + sent to team members to vet and edit. WOOHOO!! taking a break before continuing on the shiet journal. HAHA. i wouldn't be in this big toilet bowl if i didn't procrastinate. Bahahaha.

yalah my fault.

iTunes 5.0.1 has new interface and it's damned fucking ugly. bullshiet. lalalalala.... LALALA..

slowly going insane. Bah.

anyhoos. these are the days of our lives by Queen is damned nice. i can't believe i just discovered them. dammit. all the things i've been missing. i didn't even know bohemian rhapsody was by them till recently. shame on me. BOOO....



oops. sidetracked by photoshop. :/ and pride. damn!

haha. john lennon. just thought of him suddenly and had the urge to draw him.

i know it doesn't look much like him. don't throw rotten eggs at me lennon fans. :X

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4.30 am

raining incredibly heavily right now - literally pouring in sheets. sky is grey with a tinge of red. really really awesome. great for sleeping and snuggling, but i prefer listening to the rain.

the trees outside my window are shaking pretty hard. it's a little surreal, hovering between sleep and dreams.

rain is so pretty. *sigh*

ramble at 2 am.

shucks. i'm giggling everytime i listen to bohemian rhapsody. GIGGLING. omfg. maybe i should just go jump down a building or something right now. just the thought of bohemian rhapsody is enough to make me go into spasms. i'm such a retard. -_-"

i think my eyesight is going down the toilet bowl. i need to bring stuff really close to my eyes, and i see fuzzy letters when i look at the screen. face the pb 24/7 photoshop and watch vcd. siao. no more gloating about my perfect eyesight. shiet. i hate specs. they look weird on me. :/ mebbe me shall go get a pair of contacts. but my eyes water when i watch other people putting in their contacts. i think if i try to put it in my eye i'd probably cry.

argh. i need to kick this habit of reading a novel from the back. :/ usually i buy a new book, read the first few pages, get impatient, flip to the back, read the ending and re-read the book again. same goes for serials and movies. i get my paws on every single bit of information and spoiler i can get and then go watch it with eager anticipation. bahahaha. i really really need to kick this damned habit.

ramble. i need to sleep. or at least rest my eyes. i'm starting to see black blobs. pardon any spelling mistakes.

Monday, October 03, 2005

my favourite songs.

i work better when there's music playing.


some of my fav songs. i can listen to them 1000 times and not get sick.

in no particular order :

X - x japan
orenji no taiyou - gackt & hyde
freesia ~op.2~ - gackt
eleanor rigby - beatles
november rain - guns n roses
masquerade - hyde
infinite dreams - iron maiden
immigrant song - led zeppelin
world comin' down - billy idol
possibly maybe - bjork
heal me, i'm heartsick - no vacancy
shiroi ryu - joe hisaishi
rose letter - cocco (no, not that coco lee :X)
bohemian rhapsody - queen
bird cage - mr children
cage - dir en grey
everyday is exactly the same - nine inch nails
edge of seventeen - stevie nicks

alot more. haha. lazy to type out. :P


i was just surfing on the internet then i came across this article on shark's fin.

in summary : awareness of the cruelty of "finning" the shark has gone up but demand never go down.

people of the younger generation are afraid to displease their parents. parents think shark's fin got prestige. etc etc.

therefore they still continue to serve shark's fin at wedding dinners.


imagine this.

you sit at the dinning table, they serve the cold dish, and you think "oh goody, shark's fin next!"

then the emcee says "ladies and gentlemen, welcome.. blah blah blah.. we are now going to show you a special clip. please enjoy."

then on the screen you watch the sharks getting butchered and thrown back into the sea.

"omfg! i'm going to fucking puke!" you think.

and the emcee says : "now, those who want to eat shark's fin raise your hand."

i think gahmen should make it mandatory to play this clip at all weddings where shark's fin is served.

at every wedding, at least 50 sharks are killed for the shark fin you are eating.



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it's raining pretty heavily outside. so nice and cold and dark. XD my favourite weather.

Sunday, October 02, 2005


yes, another post. i just want to say i really REALLY like bohemian rhapsody and i was born to love you by queen.


on to other stuff.. why you shouldn't eat shark fin, foie gras and all that stuff.
because it sucks. really it does.

if you must, eat fake shark fin. they taste about the same anyways.


eat pigs. eat cows. eat chicken. why kill a shark just for some exotic delicacy. fuck. for just the fucking fin i might add.

pigs cows and chickens can eat the whole thing. eat them. they aren't gonna be extinct anytime soon. EAT THEM.

"but sharks eat humans! they are scary and fierce! we should wipe them off the face of the planet!"

go fuck yourself. humans shouldn't be swimming in the seas anyways. you think a shark can differentiate a human from a damned seal? you think you are a human so therefore you are legally exempted from the food chain? HAHA. FUCKING BULLSHIT.

YOU LOOK LIKE FOOD. THEREFORE IT IS GOING TO EAT YOU IF IT FEELS LIKE EATING YOU. or at least take a chomp outta you. i must say humans deserve whatever the animals do to them. we kill billions of them each day but whine when one of us gets killed.

wtfh. hah. no wonder there are so many viruses around. i wonder if the animals mutated the viruses to get back at the humans.

pig : hey chikin, you wanna trade viruses? then we can merge them and kill the damned humans.

chicken : yeah, good idea. but wouldn't we die too?

pig : at least we'd be given a proper burial.

chicken : good point.

yes. i plan to be vegetarian by the time i hit 35. if i'm still alive by then.


i've updated phreaque-art!




happy happy happy!!


oh yes, rabid fangirls are scary. hahahaahaha



i do apologise for the lame posts these past week(s). somebody was complaining to me that my blog is starting to sound like a primary one kiddy blog - a rather insane, inane and hyperactive primary one kid.

the only excuse i can give is that i'm rather preoccupied with my drawings these days.
how do you explain the rush and excitement? the joy that comes from starting a piece of work? the satisfaction that comes from completing a piece of work??

i can't really. it's like being in love, but better. much better. i can't keep my mind focused on anything else but my art. i keep wondering if the muse would call me, why he doesn't call me, getting jealous when i see people who are much better artists than i am.. etc etc.. the usual stuff you feel when you're in love.

i can't say i can draw very well. i can't say that i'm better than others. the only thing i can however say is that i will continue to draw, to practice and to give all that i have to be the best that i can be.

yes. it's off to the doodle board again.



i've updated phreaque-art!


Saturday, October 01, 2005

Now you know why.

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random doodle. bahhahahaha.


ARGH FUCKED i'm so pissed off! ARGH! they were meant to be together! ARGH!

now me will go kill the fugly spouse so they can be together.



i'm still pissed. ARGH. ARGHHH!





HAHahahahahahahahah!! HAHAHAhaHAhAhahah!!!

okie i'm slowly being driven insane by homicidal thoughts. yes.. i will kill them.. muahahaha.. then they can be together like they should be... muahhaahaha....

i will kill them... hahahaha....

Random post

i was pretty bored..... and what do you do when you're bored with a tablet by your side??

yes. you photoshop. :P

I usually get "celeb photos" to hone my photoshopping skills. sometimes accidents occur and i get stuff like this.

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And i get pretty okay ones like this (leeched the original image off maddie's blog)

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and then i was just randomly surfing when i came across a recent charlotte church photo. you can understand why i was so fucking horrified. but if you don't here's why.

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no photoshop - except for the collage by yours truly. :X you cannot imagine the amount of bad charlotte church photos out there. extremely EXTREMELY horrifying. especially since she was one of the few singers i liked back in sec school.

she looks like a ah-soh with REALLY bad bad BAD.... fashion sense. given the moneh coming outta her ears and god knows where else you'd think she'd engage a stylist. even me, the fashion heck-care disaster find her style offensive to the eye.


i've updated phreaque-art!